You may still be in shock from the moment you found out there is a baby on the way. Even planned and much awaited pregnancies tend to knock the wind right out of new Dads. Some will tell you that even baby number 2 or 3 comes with a scare factor. Men are different than women when it comes to pregnancy and childbirth. While you can’t change your DNA, you can still get yourself ready for baby in an effective way.
Embrace your Unique Thought Process
While your wife is busy sifting through a pile of nursery paint samples, you are most likely thinking about how to pay for the paint. At this point, a Dad usually observes the pile of baby clothes and equipment and starts tallying up the bill all the way to college. This often is the cause of a full blown panicky feeling that new fathers often try to hide. There is a reason you think this way, embrace it and use it wisely. Also understand that the mother-to-be is panicking about things too, you are not alone. She is probably scared out of her mind over what she is eating, how much weight she is gaining and if those paint fumes are hurting the baby. Take your concerns and find a healthy way to take action. If you are worried about finances, write out a budget. You may not be able to stop the baby prep shop-a-thon,but you can look for sales and research products to find the best buy and quality. Start a small savings account for the new baby, even if it has barely anything in it. Sometimes just feeling productive will help to ease some anxiety. Use your manly skills for good, Super Dad!
Patience, Patience, Patience
Odds are, the wonderful mother of your child has gone through quite a few changes, even if the pregnancy is still early on. Just like you have strong fears and emotions about the new addition, mom is dealing with her own difficulties. At some point, it is going to hit her that the life of this baby is completely dependent on her body to survive. This is terrifying, by the way. On top of this, her body is doing all sorts of creative things to accommodate this responsibility. These lovely changes are making her feel sick, crazy, and downright weird. Many women handle pregnancy very gracefully, if your wife is not one of them, you are in the majority. Do not respond to anything without taking a deep breath first. Think, think, and think before you speak, especially in anger. The new mom may be looking to you as a sort of anchor to hold on to in her new world of hormones. Support and patience will help to keep both of you sane. It can be very helpful to continuously remind yourself this part is only temporary.
It can really help to shift your focus during the pregnancy when things are getting rough. Think about the first time you will see your baby’s face, watching first steps, and birthday parties. Take a day and do something fun to prepare for the baby. Shop for a special outfit or keepsake or celebrate with a special desert. Many modern baby showers include the fathers. If you are invited to the shower, do not decline, the excitement and celebration can be a lot of fun. If you have some special skills, such as woodworking, use them to make something for your bundle of joy. There are so many things to look forward to, forget your worries for a bit and focus on the excitement.
Expecting dads can be quickly overwhelmed with the new responsibility of parenting. There are so many good things that parenting brings, it is pertinent to adjust your thinking a bit when you get overwhelmed. Men often feel better when they take action. There is plenty to be done while getting ready for baby, find out what is needed and get moving! You can make a big difference in those exciting nine months when you find a way to be productive and caring.