Nagging

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Children are persistent and tend to not easily take “no” for an answer. Screaming and nagging can become a habit. Children of any age can use this nagging behaviour and will keep asking for something until the parent says “yes”. Giving in may seem like the easiest option, because it gives the parent peace and quiet, however this teaches children that nagging works and next time the child wants something they will repeat the cycle.

The reason the child keeps asking for something even when mother says no is simple. He/she knows that the mother will eventually give in and this is normal to want to stop the nagging. But when mother gives in, it will only make the nagging worse the next time.

Handling a nagging child:

Many parents are in the habit of not truly listening to their kids. First of all, parents should consider each request made by the child carefully and think before giving an answer.  No must mean no so make sure that is what you mean!If you say no and then retract and say yes this habit puts you in a position of weakness. We all change our minds sometimes. We all make mistakes, but doing this habitually is not a good thing for the parent or child. If you do find you change your mind it is important to explain to your child the reasons why your answer has changed, stressing that this time is an exception. 

The second thing parents should do is to give an answer and stick to it.  If a parent is in the habit of changing their mind, it will be tough at first. But they must teach the child that when they say “No” they mean it, and when they say “Yes” they will honor any commitment that comes with it. Note that the peace and comfort resulting from using this method will be well worth the effort!

Another helpful method is “Reinforcing Good Behavior” which means discouraging bad behavior, such as nagging by not giving attention and response and by reinforcing good behaviour with attention and praise. When the child listens without any arguments or does what he/she is told, the parent should reinforce this behavior by thanking him/her for listening or by telling himher how nice it is when he/her does not nag. This will make the child keen to get the praise so that he/her will repeat this good behavior in the future.

If the child continues to ask for something after the parent has said “No”, the parent can just walk away or ignore if they cannot walk away without the need to over explain. The child will soon realise that nagging is not worth his or her energy as it does not work. 

7 Tips to Stop The Nagging Behavior And Motivating Children: 

  • Parents should try to talk to their child and get to know what his likings are.
  • Parents should not treat them as little children as they hate to be treated as children.They need to be recognized as an individual identity.
  • Gentle reminders always work and get things done, better and faster than other methods. These approaches reduce nagging.
  • Nagging behavior in children needs attention, so mother should ignore him/her once or twice and they will stop nagging.
  • Provide them with arts that are more creative to them. This will help them letting out all their negative emotions.
  • Instead of lecturing the child, mother should let him/her work it out. Once the child realizes that he/she made a mistake and takes ownership of it, he is less likely to repeat it again.
  • Divert their attention from the source of nagging and engage them in a discussion they would love to contribute.

Remember that what may seem the easier option of ‘giving in’ at the time for the instant peace and quiet and end to nagging will actually make it harder for the parent in the long term as it will teach a child to nag and persist instead of learning in the first instance that it is not worth their while.

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