It’s what’s obsessing them again at the beginning of the school year: your child is vehemently refusing to go to school for the second year in a row.
You try to make them see the value in it, but in vain.
So here they are, back to sudden fake illnesses, crying, and complaining about everything, and here you are, searching for the right way to deal with the crisis.
During their first year of school, you spent a rough month together before they began to get used to the new environment that had “ripped them away” from their mother’s embrace and gave up the “weapons” of tears and playing sick, but now you’re back at square one. How do you face the crisis that’s taking shape?
- Don’t be anxious or overreact to your child’s behavior; the freedom and escape from strict rules that come with the summer vacation lead to an attitude of rejection in children, which may be fleeting and simply a test of your patience.
- Therefore, don’t give in to any negotiation in this regard, and make your child understand that going to school is not a subject that’s up for any discussion.
- At the same time, don’t belittle their fears about school by saying things like, “Don’t you feel ashamed to be afraid of school?” or “Don’t you see all the children from the neighborhood get into the bus every morning?”
- Listen to them with all the patience you can muster, and try again and again to emphasize the positive and pleasant aspects of school. For example, say “Do you know how many friends you’ll meet at school this year? Don’t you want to join the taekwondo team?”
- In order to reinforce the idea that school is a beautiful place that’s necessary for their development and not a punishment for something they’ve done, go visit the school together before the school year begins. Have a picnic on the playground or play a sport in the open air, and remember to tell them about the pleasant experiences you had at school when you were young.
- Out of school, make sure you always present them to children their age at family events, in the mall, or even in the neighborhood; this will help get rid of their fear of the strangers they’ll meet in the desks at school.
- Remember that you are the most important example in your child’s life and that what they hear from you about school will have the biggest influence on their feelings and fears at once. If, for example, we say, “At school, we live the most beautiful years of our lives,” their impulse will be to forget their fears and enter into the adventure excitedly.